Is Masturbation Sinful?

Often called a grey area or amoral, I've never really heard/read masturbation treated thoroughly and biblically. I think this note by Zuba is the most comprehensive and compelling treatment I have found and so I thought I should share it.

By Zuba Mwanza

Before I begin, I would like to state that my writing of this note was to a large extent motivated by an article I read on the Modern Ghana page, entitled "Pastor Chris Oyakhilome's theory of Masturbation". In this article, Pastor Chris is quoted saying the following,

"Masturbation in itself is not a sin against God. Satan simply uses it in oppressing Christians and making them feel ineffective and inefficient in God's sight. But, once u understand that it has nothing to do with God, but its about you and your body..."

He said these words in a telecast when asked the question, "How can a Christian overcome Masturbation?" And when his response clearly seemed to have raised a lot of dust, he reinforced his position a few weeks later in another telecast (which I happen to have a copy of, and is also on Youtube) by clearly stating that, "It was not a slip of the tongue.." (as many who hold him in high esteem had been saying).

Everything God created is good [Gen.1:31]. And part of what God created is sex, our desire for it, as well our capacity to enjoy it. And these too, are good. However, sexual intercourse was created to be enjoyed ONLY in a marriage context.

By definition, Masturbation is "the act of giving yourself sexual pleasure by rubbing your sexual organs," (Oxford, 2010).

The concept of masturbation is basically deriving sexual pleasure n' satisfaction in a manner that is not ordained by God. If God is the one that created sex, as well as our capacity to enjoy it, He therefore has right to determine/ prescribe the manner & context in which it can be enjoyed.

Unlike the sexual desire God created, lust is a bodily passion. It is a perversion of that which God intended for good. It is essentially a strong sexual craving, aimed at that which God has forbidden (ie. Sex outside marriage). Where as sexual desire is perfectly natural n' enables a married man/ woman to enjoy sexual intercourse, lust develops when "by one's sinful desires, a person is dragged away and enticed," (James1:14). Lust is normally fanned by what we watch (eg. Movies, magazines), what we listen to (eg. Songs, erotic stories from peers), as well as what we read (eg. Erotic novels and stories in online or printed articles). Lust is sinful firstly becoz God says so (1Pet4:3, Col3:5, 2Pet2:18, 1Corint7:9b, Prov6:25, Gal5:19-21). But secondly, it is sinful because, it drives one to imagine him/ herself enjoyin that which disgusts God. That for which Christ was crucified! Therefore, He says, "Whoever looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart." Matt5:28. This is becoz, when u are havin lustful thots, the only thing keepin u from committing the sin physically is circumstance. Otherwise, given the ideal environment n' opportunity to do so, u wud seize it! However, God's will is that we shud keep away from sin becoz of our LOVE for him, n' not our fear of diseases, pregnancy or pipo walkin in on us. He wants us to hate sin for what it is. To "learn to control our bodies in a manner that is holy n' honorable, n' not in PASSIONATE LUST like the non-believer do.." 1Thessalon4:3-5.

One of the major reasons masturbation can NEVER be justified is becoz, without doubt, it is a product of passionate lust. In the earlier mentioned telecast n' article, Pastor Chris' underpinning argument is that "the sin is LUST, & not the masturbation that results from it. Because, masturbation is a habit like any other." This cannot be true simply because, whereas the Bible clearly forbids us to ACT OUT OF passionate lust as the non-believers do [1Thess4:5], that's exactly what masturbation is. In the telecast, he further argues that, "we cannot say that eating bread is wrong simply because we know someone who stole bread and ate it. In the same way, masturbation is NOT sinful, but the lust that leads to it is." This kind of reasoning is faulty because, if we are to go by it, even stealing wud not be sinful, except for the Covetousness or lack of contentment that leads to it. Therefore, if God is disgusted by Lustful thots, how much more what they lead to and what sustains them? Hence, not only is it improper for God's holy children [as Eph5:3 puts it], but also it offends God, becoz your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit [1Corinth6:18-20].

In addition, masturbation involves the arousal n' gratification of ones sexual desires in an illegitimate manner. Illegitimate in that, God the law giver does not approve. Masturbation is essentially sex with yourself. And so, eventho we may have no control over certain things that can arouse our sexual feelings, He requires that we "LEARN TO CONTROL OUR BODIES in a manner that is holy and honorable."1Thess4:4.

Therefore my beloved friend, if u are in the habit of masturbating, I wud like u to know that it is a SIN against God, and that He can enable u quit it (Titus2:11-12). I also urge all who will read this to live Self-controlled lives, becoz the ability to deny yourself that which u desire, primarily becoz God does not approve, is one of the surest ways of knowing that His Spirit lives in you!

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Your Own Jesus

Casting Crown's lead singer, Mark Hall, has a book to his name entitled "Your Own Jesus". My brother has an excellent review of it on his blog. To check it out, click here!

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So, You've Graduated. Now What?

I attended a dinner for graduates and the guest of honor, Mrs. Nchito, gave a great speech about graduating from college. Since I am at that stage of life as well I found it very helpful. She said things I had never heard of before. She was kind enough to write something for my blog.

___________________________________________

You are about to graduate and are wondering, now what? Its been a long slog, there have been highs and lows and yet it has all seemed to go by so fast. You're fast approaching the day you have waited for the majority of your young life, and fear and anxiety are mingled with all the excitement.



Two Truths

There are two fundamental truths that you should hold on to during the next few months as you begin life after school.

1.     Romans 8: 28 – And we know that all things work together for good to those called according to his purpose. When the Bible says “all things” it means just that. Yes, even the rejection you will receive from companies you long to work for and the long months that will pass before you find a job. All these things will be working together for your good and will be working towards “His purpose” for your life. The Lord may be teaching you something or may want you to become aware of something or may even want you to do something for him before he gives a job that will keep you too busy to serve him. So even in times of despair always hold on to this truth. This experience is a strengthening your faith.

2.     1 Cor 10:31 – Whatever you do, do as unto the Lord. Secondly, when you finally do find something to do no matter how trivial it may seem remember to do it diligently as “unto the Lord.” This applies even to voluntary jobs. Do them as unto the Lord. You never know who you may be impressing. When you do get a job you must be dependable, show dedication by giving 100%. Do not join unbelievers as they complain and gossip about their superiors. You are Christ’s ambassador in the work place, not the chief complainant (2 Tim 2:15).

Seven P's

1. Put God first – He knows what is best for you and his ways are not your ways nor his time your time. Pray about your situation earnestly. Ask others to pray with and for you. We often underestimate the power of prayer.
2. Patience – You are dealing with an unknown time frame. It could take one day or one year. Be prepared to face it.
3. Purity – You may face times of extreme temptation. There are a lot of wrong things happening out there. You will be told it depends on whose hands you oil etc. Do not act like unbelievers (Hebrews 11:1).
4. Perseverance – Many give up too quickly. Do not stop trying until the very last door is shut and bolted. Make an effort to see employers in person when you leave application letters.
5. Be Practical – If the only job available is in a rural area, take it. We have a tendency of shunning rural areas. The Lord may be sending you as a missionary (Isaiah 6:8, Romans 10:14-15). It is also easier to find a job when you are in a job.
6. Do not be Proud – You have a qualification by the grace of God. Do not look down on those who have not been as fortunate. Pride stops us from taking up jobs we consider below us when in fact it is actually very beneficial if we start from the bottom in an organization. That way we learn more than any qualification can ever teach us. Do not ignore workmates below you. They probably know more than you do about the organization and you may need their help (Proverbs 29:23, Proverbs 16:18).
7. Plan – Don’t function haphazardly. Organize your time constructively. Have a list of all the organizations you are targeting. Give yourself deadlines for the delivery of applications etc. Set goals. Do something! Even growing vegetables is better than doing nothing.

Nine Tips For Job Hunting

• Collect correct and adequate information- Do not rely on hearsay from friends. Some friends may deliberately mislead you so make an effort to find or verify information for yourself. Check papers daily if possible.
• Learn to ask for business cards, keep peoples telephone numbers, email addresses and learn to network.
• Where possible drop off applications in person. The postal system is not the most reliable.
• Be observant and attentive - the church is a resource center, but many youths do not know or care to know what older church members do.
• Be objective – if you are trained as a teacher and there is an advert for a teaching job, do not snub it for a managerial job which has not been advertised. Be ready to enter an organization at the lowest level.
• Know your own strengths and weaknesses. Know what type of job you will enjoy doing.
• Be ready to volunteer. Volunteering is one way of learning skills or even getting a job later. It is also a way of giving back to society.
• Learn how to write professional curriculum vitae (CV) and application letters. This is the first impression that would-be employers will have about you. Employers have been known to receive application letters written in SMS lingo.
• Understand what is required when one is sitting for job interviews.

Conclusion

Now that you have finished your studies take time out and return to the starting point. Go back to your parents/guardians and say THANK YOU. Do not only do it verbally but show them that you are truly grateful for their support by working around the house. Let them send you around the way they used to when you were younger. Learn to be useful to those nearest to you before offering yourself as someone’s employee. Remember that this may be the last time you spend time in their home as you are soon to make your own home (Exodus 20:12).

In whatever situation you find yourself in the few months after graduating, remember Romans 8:28. Whatever it is that you are going through it is for your good.


by Mrs W. S. Nchito

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The Day I Dreaded Has Finally Come (Ps. Singogo's Farewell Service)

~by Edwin Mpande.

"The day I feared most has come upon me, what I dreaded has happened to me. brethren, the day I feared most has come, 26th February, 2012 when I should bid farewell to the congregation I love having served as Pastor for 12 and half years."

Fashioning his opening statement after Job 3:25, which he read to the congregation, Pastor Grave Singogo opened his speech with the words above as he bed farewell to Evangel Baptist Church to join Ndola Baptist Church on the Copperbelt, the first ever baptist church in Zambia. The auditorium was filled to capacity with people coming from an assortment of sister churches in Lusaka, some travelling great distances from outside Lusaka. Also in attendance were 13 members of Ndola Baptist Church, Pastor Grave’s new Church; as if to say, "We have come to get him."

The occasion was divided in two sessions, the first session being the normal church service which involved among other things the singing of songs, reading of the scriptures and the preaching of God’s Word. This was followed by a wonderful lunch which ushered in the second session where Pastor Grave gave his moving, mind sobering, well structured, farewell speech. This session also saw an Elder give a speech on behalf of both the Eldership and the church and the session ended with the Elders laying hands on both Pastor Grave and his "brown" wife, as he himself often puts it from the pulpit. Pastor Collins Sakalunda prayed as the Elders laid their hands.

In his sermon, preaching from John 3:30, which reads "He must become great, I must become less", Pastor Ronald Kalifungwa of Lusaka Baptist Church encouraged the congregation to emulate the attitude and spirit of John the Baptist, of letting Christ take the glory and honor while we ourselves decrease. This was a fitting sermon as Pastor Kalifungwa applied it to both the church membership, non-Christians in attendance and Pastor Grave himself emphasizing the need for both the Pastor leaving and the congregation staying to remain Christ centered and the non-Christian to search themselves as to whether or not Christ is central in their lives.




In his speech, Pastor Grave mentioned that the work at Evangel was not his and neither was the success of the church achieved by him alone, rather, it was God's work and they worked as a team. To that end, he thanked the Elders, the Deacons and the church members for their participation and contributions at Evangel Baptist Church.

Furthermore, he took the opportunity to apologize to the congregation for any wrong that he may have done in the course of his duty. "I am not perfect and I will not pretend to be perfect," he said.









He took advantage of the occasion to thank everyone for the spiritual, financial and material support rendered to him and his family during the 12 and a half years that he served at Evangel Baptist Church.

He acknowledge the 'blue moon' privilege of being both a son and Pastor to his 89 year old (this July) father as he thanked him for having infused in him life principles such as time management and financial discipline, which have helped him significantly in his life and his pastorate in particular. In his characteristic manner, with a finger pointed at his Father, Pastor Grave commanded “I am now talking to you as your Pastor” as he asked him to stand and the congregation gave the man (who appeared proud of his son) a round of applause. He went on to thank his dear wife for having been afflicted with him in his afflictions and happy with him in his happiness. Lastly, he thanked God for being there for him.


He ended his speech by saying that it would be sad, and a burden to both him and his wife, Irene, if he heard that people have left Evangel Baptist Church because he has left. He pleaded with all the members to remain committed and faithful to the work, recalling the sermon which underlined Christ's increase and everyone else's decrease. Something I felt was critical to mention.

Mr. Lovemore Nkhoma, one of the three remaining Elders at Evangel Baptist Church, gave a brief but whole encompassing speech. "We will be prayerful, patient and consult widely as we look for someone to fill Pastor Grave Singogo’s position," he said.


The departure of Pastor Grave has been received with mixed feelings. When asked for a comment on the general feelings of Evangel Baptist members, one of them responded saying "Well... its 50 – 50, but for me, its 100%, I would have loved him to stay". As if that was not enough, an inconsolable woman was seen teary as she hugged and said bye to both Pastor Grave and his wife.

Well, what can I say other than to wish Pastor Grave a successful ministry at Ndola Baptist Church and pray for the elders at Evangel Baptist Church as they look for someone to fill the position of Pastor. As Pastor himself put it, "It would be a sin for Irene and I to stay, it would be like Jonah, as we believe it is the Lord directing us to move."

The manner in which the entire event was conducted was both refreshing and commendable. To God be the glory!

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We Are Champions Of Africa!

Christopher Katongo receives trophy

Zambia is now the champion of Africa! Winning the Africa Cup of Nations is the greatest football achievement an African country can attain. Very few countries can speak of such an achievement and after coming so close twice, in 73' and 93', we have finally managed it beating the lauded Ivory Coast on penalties. Our boys won it and are back home safe and sound. The joy has been explosive. The evening we won, thousands took to the streets to celebrate from midnight onwards. Lots of people lost their minds. One was walking dead smack in the middle of the road in his boxers with our national flag. And as he walked passed me he said out loud, “If you don’t feel good today, when are you ever going to feel good?”

Kat, a young lady here in Zambia from America whose blog I follow wrote:

It's a lot like the elections only about 10 times more, because now it's not just Sata’s supporters, its every single person. I wish everyone could experience this kind of excitement and patriotism... every single person in the country on the same page, all happy about the same thing, all in it together, all dancing and high fiving in the streets... for days (I still hear yelling and car horns and vuvuzelas, 2 days later!) Awesome.

Awesome indeed.

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C S Lewis On Love

Of all arguments against love none makes so strong an appeal to my nature as “Careful! This might lead you to suffering.”

To my nature, my temperament, yes. Not to my conscience. When I respond to that appeal I seem to myself to be a thousand miles away from Christ. If I am sure of anything I am sure that his teaching was never meant to confirm my congenital preference for safe investments and limited liabilities.…

There is no safe investment. To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly be broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness.

But in that casket — safe, dark, motionless, airless — it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. The alternative to tragedy, or at least to the risk of tragedy, is damnation. The only place outside Heaven where you can be perfectly safe from all the dangers and perturbations of love is Hell.

The Four Loves, (New York, Harcourt, 1960), Kindle Location 1541.

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Tears Of The World

Sometimes we become familiar and consequently numb to the need around us, and life just goes on. This song by Michael Card is a prayer, that God might grant us, when we are numb, even the slightest feeling towards the sorrowful in this world.

In any split second of a moment of time,
In the blink that is one single day,
The sum of the sorrow that wraps round the world
Would catch ever soul up and sweep them away.

As vast as the ocean, as deep as the sea,
Swept up in one toxic tide.
By warm salty waves the world weeps its woe
So how can it be that my own tears are dry?

So open my eyes and open my heart
And grant me the gift of your grieving
And awaken in me the compassion to weep
Just one of the tears of the world.

When God walked among us in the fullness of time
He wept tears as old as the world
Acquainted with sorrow, he took up the cup
And drank every drop of the poison that heals. 

So open my eyes and open my heart
And grant me the gift of your grieving
And awaken in me the compassion to weep
Just one of the tears of the world.

by Michael Card

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The Parable of the Four Boyfriends (Part 2 ~The Interpretation)

In truth, you have four boyfriends in your lives:

Your fourth boyfriend is your body. No matter how much time and effort you lavish in making it look good, it will leave you when you die.

Your third boyfriend is your possessions, status and wealth.When you die, it will all go to others.

Your second boyfriend is your family and friends. No matter how much they have been there for you, the furthest they can stay by you is up to the grave.

And your first boyfriend is your soul. Often neglected in the pursuit of wealth, power, fame and pleasures of the world.

However, your soul is the only thing that will follow you where ever you go. Cultivate, strengthen and cherish it now, for it is the only part of you that will follow you to the throne of God and continue with you throughout Eternity.

Matthew 16:26 ~And what do you benefit if you gain the whole world but lose your own soul? Is anything worth more than your soul? (New Living Translation)

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The Parable of the Four Boyfriends (Part 1 ~The Story)

By Kema Ching'ambu

There was a girl who had four boyfriends.

She loved the fourth boyfriend the most and adorned him with rich robes and treated him to the finest of delicacies. She gave him nothing but the best.

She also loved the third boyfriend very much and was always showing him off to neighboring kingdoms. However, she feared that one day he would leave her for another.

She also loved her second boyfriend. He was her confidant and was always kind, considerate and patient with her. Whenever this girl faced a problem, she could confide in him, and he would help her get through the difficult times.

The girl's first boyfriend was a very loyal partner and had made great contributions in maintaining her wealth and kingdom.. However, she did not love the first boyfriend. Although he loved her deeply, she hardly took notice of him!

One day, the girl fell ill and she knew her time was short. She thought of her luxurious life and wondered, "I now have four boyfriends with me, but when I die, I'll be all alone."

Thus, she asked her fourth boyfriend, "I loved you the most, endowed you with the finest clothing and showered great care over you. Now that I'm dying, will you follow me and keep me company?" "No way!", replied the fourth boyfriend, and he walked away without another word. His answer cut like a sharp knife right into her heart.

The sad girl then asked her third boyfriend, "I loved you all my life. Now that I'm dying, will you follow me and keep me company?" "No!", replied the third boyfriend. "Life is too good! When you die, I'm going to marry someone else!" Her heart sank and turned cold.

She then asked her second boyfriend, "I have always turned to you for help and you've always been there for me. When I die, will you follow me and keep me company?" "I'm sorry, I can't help you out this time!", replied the second boyfriend. "At the very most, I can only walk with you to your grave." His answer struck her like a bolt of lightning, and the girl was devastated.

Then a voice called out: "I'll go with you. I'll follow you no matter where you go." The girl looked up, and there was her first boyfriend. He was very skinny as he suffered from malnutrition and neglect. Greatly grieved, the girl said, "I should have taken much better care of you when I had the chance!"


Click here to view the interpretation.

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10 Reasons Not to Have Sex Outside of Marriage

By Mary Fairchild

Reason #1 - God Tells Us Not to Have Sex Outside of Marriage

In the seventh of God's Ten Commandments, he instructs us not to have sex with anyone other than our spouse. It is clear that God forbids sex outside of marriage. When we obey God, he is pleased. He honors our obedience by blessing us.

Deuteronomy 28:1-3

If you fully obey the LORD your God ... [he] will set you high above all the nations on earth. All these blessings will come upon you and accompany you if you obey the LORD your God ... (NIV)

God has a reason for giving us this command. First and foremost, he knows what's best for us. By obeying him, we trust God to look out for our best interests.



Reason #2 - We Won't Miss Out on the Blessing of the Wedding Night

There's something very special about a couple's first time. In this physical act the two become one flesh. Yet it is more than just physical oneness — a spiritual union takes place. God planned for this exclusive experience of discovery and pleasure to happen only within the intimacy of marriage. If we don't wait, we miss out on a very special blessing from God.

1 Corinthians 6:16

Sex is as much spiritual mystery as physical fact. As written in Scripture, "The two become one." Since we want to become spiritually one with the Master, we must not pursue the kind of sex that avoids commitment and intimacy, leaving us more lonely than ever—the kind of sex that can never "become one." (The Message)



Reason #3 - We Will Be Spiritually Healthier

If we live as carnal or fleshly Christians, we will seek to gratify the desires of the flesh and live only to please ourselves. If we live this way, the Bible says we cannot please God. We will be miserable under the weight of our sin. As we continue to feed our fleshly desires, our spirit will grow weak and our relationship with God will be destroyed. Complacency with sin leads to worse sin, and eventually, spiritual death.

Romans 8:8,13

Those controlled by the sinful nature cannot please God. For if you live according to the sinful nature, you will die; but if by the Spirit you put to death the misdeeds of the body, you will live ... (NIV)



Reason #4 - We Will Be Physically Healthier

This one is a no-brainer. If we refrain from sex outside of marriage, we will be protected from the risk of catching sexually transmitted diseases.

1 Corinthians 6:18

Run from sexual sin! No other sin so clearly affects the body as this one does. For sexual immorality is a sin against your own body. (NLT)



Reason #5 - We Will Be Emotionally Healthier

One reason God tells us to honor marriage and keep the marriage bed pure has to do with baggage. We carry baggage into our sexual relationships. Memories from the past, emotional scars and unwanted mental images can defile our thoughts and make the marriage bed less than pure. Certainly God can forgive the past, but that doesn't mean we're free from the baggage that can linger in our minds.

Hebrews 13:4

Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral. (NIV)
 


Reason #6 - We Will Show Consideration for Our Partner's Well-Being

If we put our partner's needs above our own and consider their spiritual well-being, we'll be compelled to wait for sex. We, like God, will want what's best for them.

Ephesians 5:2

Live a life filled with love, following the example of Christ. He loved us and offered himself as a sacrifice for us, a pleasing aroma to God. (NLT)

Philippians 2:3

Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind regard one another as more important than yourselves; (NASB)



Reason #7 - Waiting is a Test of True Love

Love is patient. That's about as simple as it gets. We can learn the sincerity of our partner's love by their willingness, or lack thereof, to wait.

1 Corinthians 13:4-5

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking ... (NIV)



Reason #8 - We Will Have No Negative Consequences to Deal With

There are always consequences to sin. Some of those effects can be devastating. An unwanted pregnancy, a decision to have an abortion or place a child for adoption, broken relationships with family and friends — these are just a few of the possible outcomes we face when we choose to have sex outside of marriage. We should be sure to consider the snow ball effect of sin. And what if the relationship does not last? Hebrews 12:1 shows that sin hinders our lives and easily entangles us. We will be much better off if we avoid these negative consequences.



Reason #9 - We Will Keep Our Christian Testimony Intact

We don't set a very good example of godly living when we disobey God. The Bible says in 1 Timothy 4:12 to "be an example to all believers in what you say, in the way you live, in your love, your faith, and your purity." (NIV)

In Matthew 5:13 Jesus compares his followers to "salt" and "light" when we represent him in the world. When we no longer shine the light of Christ, when we lose our Christian testimony, we lose our "saltiness." In other words, we become flavorless and bland. We lose our ability to attract the world to Christ. Luke 14:34-35 puts it strongly, saying that salt without saltiness is worthless, not even fit for the manure pile.



Reason #10 - We Won't Settle For Less Than God's Perfect Will

When we choose to have sex outside of marriage, we settle for less than God's perfect will — for ourselves and for our partner. And if we do this, we don't know what we might end up with. Perhaps we'll end up in a miserable marriage.

So, here's some food for thought: If your partner wants sex before marriage, consider this as a warning sign about their spiritual condition. If you are the one who wants sex before marriage, consider this as a warning sign of your own spiritual condition.

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